Anonymous commented : Hi APJ and others, I’ve been reading this amazing topic for a few days. Thanks APJ for your sincerity, not many people have the courage to admit certain things. I most agree with the views from Robert and Collin. APJ, I have a feeling that you will not get a better advice than that! I also agree with AD, in matters such as this it is better to follow a truly down to earth common sense advice. It is appalling how "tradition" (the word makes me shiver) it is abuse and use as a passport to commit all sort of felonies. What a lot of BS! You set the rules yourself, base in fairness, self respect and trust and not in gullible and out of date believes that not even all Thais abide. Please stay well away the ones that pretend to show me the “rules”! What I find sad in the story is the fact that you and your lady have been together for 3 years. And then after all this time emerged the question “money”. So it appears that in this glorious country you never can relax. Makes you feel very wary! Regarding the future, it seems to me that it is extremely important that you handle this situation right. Whatever you do APJ; I wish you the best of luck. Juan

Anonymous commented : hi colin, noted. in any case, APJ has received plenty of advice fom different folks on the matter with different views. The ball's in his hands now. Whatever the outcome, APJ, I hope that you make the right decision for you and find happiness... whatever that might be. rgds & good luck sardines

Anonymous commented : hi colin, "....but in a straight battle with whats between your ears and whats between your legs, the latter wins in most cases " I'll be honest to admit that the above is the case for me every weekend after the 1st 3 glasses of scoth on the rocks. cheers sardines

Anonymous commented : Max 1. I do not know. But if you ask any Thai in your district, they will be able to tell you where the district office is. 2. No. Just walk in. It takes less than 30 minutes to complete all the paperwork. 3. You are not required to bring witnesses but you may if you wish. 4. It used to be 40 baht to get married. (2003) 5. You should have no problem. There should be someone in the district office who speaks English, particularly if you are getting married at one of the popular foreigner destinations. (Bangkok, Pattaya, etc) 6. No, but it nevertheless would be proper to dress respectfully. Casual slacks and shirt is fine.. No flip flops, shorts, etc I would not suggest hiring a lawyer, etc etc.. You can handle all of it yourself.. It is quite easy. Good Luck to you and your fiancee. Robert

Anonymous commented : Hi Robert, thanks for your info!

Anonymous commented : It is sad to hear this one. There are hundreds thousand stories like this with Thai women. His son, or daughter, may stroll in street now. I am in haggle with a Thai woman to custody my son and daughter. Their mother now demands 30,000 dollar compensation and one house in order to release our children who are ready for a prestigeous international school by my patronage. This woman's mother had 5 husbands who all were cheated, Her sister, ex-prostitute now stay in New Jersey and cheats an naive American man and she even does agent to destroy many ordinary Thai husband and wife to match new marriage to many american old men. In Thailand, children are a property (sombat) and daughters are the most important thing for old mother to eat freely. Be careful.

Anonymous commented : Gosh, $30,000! I know she contacted him once a couple of years ago and wanted money. He refused and said if she was struggling then to just give him his son. She never called back. I told him to start saving money, just in case. Even if he had to "compensate" her, just do it for the sake of his son. But he was afraid that she'd just somehow trick him and keep asking for more and more money without ever letting him see his son. I just feel like there's no closure on this. If you hear of any websites, please let me know. Thank you.