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    Getting divorced in Thailand

    By Anonymous, Created on: 31/07/2007, Last updated on: 02/12/2007

    » Has anyone had experience getting divorced in Thailand where the woman does not want to grant the divorce and claims she does not want money? I think the only way to resolve is to hire a lawyer but I have concerns of getting ripped off by him/her. I am a foreigner. Any suggestions? If all else fails...

    • Anonymous commented : We met early march 1998 and became acquaintance late October the same year. She was a street girl at that time and was only 20 years old. From all indication, it was certain that she has fallen in love with me but in my mind she is just one of my girl friends Before the end of 1999, she was the closest girl to me and I became to be aware of her concealed pasts like her earlier marriage with Thai man. She even told me that she had two babies with her ex-husband. Not withstanding everything she told me, the relationship blossomed. Before December 1999 she got pregnant for me deliberately, and when I knew of her pregnancy I took her for marriage. After our marriage I opened a beauty salon for her so that she can stop her wayward life. She managed the salon ineffectively for two months and it was closed. After her delivery, I open a restaurant for her that lasted for four months and windup. In 2003 we had another baby, by this time I have decided to introduce her into my line of business which is garment. I opened a garment shop for her like my own with goods worth more than 1.2m baht. Fearing that this new garment shop may go down, I called her one night to know if any financial family problem worrying her and to my surprise she told me that she needed a house in her village and monthly allowance for her two kids with ex-husband. I granted her request and things stated moving fine. By 2005 I have completed a duplex house in their village with monthly allowance of 10,000 baht for her ex-husband kids. Early 2006 I purchased a car for her and by the middle of 2006, she went back to her former life (wayward), she got drunk every night, smokes and sometimes comes back late midnight. Before December 2006 I have invited her parents twice to Bangkok to talk sense into their daughter but all to no avail and things continue to worsen. Starting from January 2007 she has formed a nasty habit of sleeping a whole day outside. Before the end February she has lost count of our two babies. Completely, she lost knowledge of their welfare (our kids). At one time she came back one morning, and I requested her to cook food for our babies and her reply was no, she proceeded to say that she will prefer to divorce me instead of cooking food for the babies. At this stage, I decided to invite few of her friends and mine to deliberate on her situation. It was obvious that this meeting has no impact on her as nothing changed. By July 2007,she has started sleeping four to five days outside our matrimonial home and her friends rumored that she play cards. Thinking that she has a mental problem I took her to psychiatric doctor who confirmed her mentally sound. Confirmed that she is not mental ill, I invited her parents again for her counseling which didn't work. Later I gave up on her, but still undecided on what to do with her, bearing in mind that she had two kids with me, it was almost impossible to think of divorce. As God wanted it, she proposed for divorce and I accepted her. Early October, we went to divorce with following understanding that (1) the two kids would be in my custody. (2) She retains one of our former shops herself. (3) She will have unlimited access to our kids. (4) She retains one of our two cars. (5) The responsibility of our two kids relies solely on me. This, we agreed and went to divorce the following week. After the divorced, coincidental my visa was expiring the same month, therefore I went to my lawyer for advice on how to renew my visa since my divorced wife will not go to immigration again with me. Lawyer advised that I marry another Thai woman to enable me renew my visa, relying on the lawyer's advice I married another Thai woman who is presently living with me. My predicament, as I'm writing this message is my ex-wife who bent on tormenting me. After one month we divorced she came to my house and damaged my new wife's car. My new wife took her to the police and she agreed to pay for the damages. Upon the fact that we are not married now, I am still paying for her house rent. I bought a condo when I was living with her, but she knew quite well that the money used in purchasing the condo. was proceeds realized from the sale of my father’s property in my home country. When the money was transferred from my country through bank, the bank stated clearly that it was purposely to purchase condo. From look of things, it seems that she has squandered all the money in the garment shop she got when we divorced. She is now harassing me over the sale of the Condo. Or else she will use her power as a Thai citizen to deport me back to my country and claim everything that I have worked for since my new wife has no child. I have told her times without numbered that I bought the condo. For our son who is almost seven years old but she never listen. On her demand I have told her to look for buyers so that I can have a peace of mind but still she never relent on leaving me alone. Three days ago she called me to say that she is planning to kill me with witchcraft. I am not afraid of witchcraft but as desperate as she is now, I fear that she may do me something bad...Please I am asking for advice on how to be free from this Thai woman. Thanks, from Khum barikome

    • 4 replies, 3,170 views

    Forum

    Are the foreigners finding a sense of peace in Issarn?

    By pachangamac042, Created on: 07/03/2009, Last updated on: 14/05/2009

    » Dear FOS, I quite agree with you. I-Saan can still be a very charming place, even for me, I do see two different faces of I-Saan. The country side with its villages and the big metropolitan areas. I grow up in a little village with some 500 inhabitants myself. In our village there were more cows,...

    • DocN commented : Dear random yes they are a special bunch of people in Isaan. I am making that experience right now. But I guess I mean "special" not in the way you mean it! Let me introduce myself: I am a 42 year old farang from Germany. I came here in Oct. 2007, because I wanted to work abroad and as I spent (business and holiday) a lot of tinme in Thailand and I liked it, I though:"Why not go t a place you like?!". Afte 1 month I met a very nice Isaan girl (guess where? yes, Patpong!) and unfortunately I fell in love with her. Not unfortunately for her or her family, as I was giving her and them, whatever I could. I still love my girlfriend, as she is not the problem. First, I had to learn that her mom married her to a guy she had never seen before, when she was 18. Now...I know that there are arranged marriages, so I was not really shocked. He got her pregnant after a few months and as she was in the hospital, giving birth to their son, her sister saw that guy, running around with other women. (He later confessed that he was f-ing around for a long time already...well...seems not to be a major problem in Thailand or in Isaan, doesn't seem to bother him or anyone else, except my girlfriend, much) She got divorced and now (with a son) she had to go to Bangkok to work, left the son with her mom to get some money! And where does an uneducated woman of 20 years get a job? (Of course: this whole tearjerking story may be a lie and I a just a stupid farang, falling for it...but just assume for a second it was no lie!) Uneducated? Yes- her parents took her out of school when she was 12. Thats how I met her. I have no doubts in her honesty or whatever (stupid or not? not my turn to decide!) After some time we were talking about marriage (mind you it was just talking...not planning) and she informed me, that her mother wanted 500.000 Baht from me, when I married her daughter! 1) This is not rent-a-friend, so I will not pay anything. 2) I hate to talk about a woman like about a used car, but as I understand, this money is a kind of a "reward" for the parents, because they made her daughter to be a good wife, educate her and so on. Now: a girl who is takin' from school at 12 and who works in a bar and who brings a 5 year old son into the marriage...doesn't sound like she (or I) have a lot that we could thank her mom for! (yeah...giving life to her...blah blah...) 2 months ago, her family "comanded" her back to Nong Khai. Her mom was sick (we know, that was a lie!) and as mom took care of her son, it was now her duty to return and take care of mom. (A son that- if I might add- wouldn't even exist, if her mom wouldn't have sold her daughter like a slave, to some random stranger!) But ok- my girlfriend and I decided to make the best out of the situation and see each other every two weeks for a long weekend and call each other every day. Suddenly, my girlfriend told me that her mother wants to get 4000 Baht from me every month. Why? I have no idea and my girlfriend told me, not to worry about it. Now...so you don't get the wrong idea: I am sending /giving my girlfriend money every month for her and her son (and if she gives it to her mom...I can't change it...it's hers) and I pay this and that for her family, make presents to her mom, her sisters, her brothers... Yesterday my girlfriend told me, that her mom took away her ATM -card, ID-card and money, because she doen't want her daughter to go to Bangkok anymore to see me. I have no reason to doubt my girlfriend (maybe you think I should!?)...and as I said: let's assume it is the truth. Where I come from (mother or not) this is called theft and it is close to keeping her daughter hostage. These people know nothing about gratefullness for anything, they have no respect for me (and apart from me, not being willing to pay ridiculous amounts of money, I have never given them any reason to do so) or my girlfriend. Now I am not saying that all people of Isaan are that way and sure, everything may be my fault...but these guys are completely insane! They are not an example for all Isaan people and the guys f-ing around on Patpong are not the example for tourists. I respect everybody and be nice and humble to, if I feel respected. Sure: I may not be 100% familiar with EVERY thai-rule (I am not thai!), but I guess everyone makes mistakes by working abroad. Isaan is NOT the haven of tranquility, Thailand is not heaven on earth! We are all people, we all have to learn and we all make mistakes. But hiding behind "tradition" just to cover up greed...is as bad as thinking that Bangkok is the equivalent of Thailand. No offense!

    • 11 replies, 26,253 views

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